test1

MONTHLY MILESTONES of a Single Guy

Heading	First Week	Second Week	Third Week	Fourth Week
a) Bank Balance	20000	2000	200	20
b) Conveyance	Auto ("I can afford it")	Share Auto ("I would like to share. I am selfless!")	Bus ("Public figures should travel by public transport")	Walk ("Good for health")
c) Girl Friends	Eena , Meena & Tina ("I can BUY love")	Meena &Tina ("I have enough girl friends")	Tina ("I am loyal to her")	"Huh! There is no pure love on earth!"
d) Mobile Maintenance	Frequent outgoing calls ("This is what mobile is invented for")	Restricted outgoing calls ("I should not create unnecessary traffic on mobile lines")	Rare outgoing calls (" Mobile should be used in urgent situations only")	Only incoming calls ("I am not going to call her until she calls me")
e) Boozing	"Come, let's go to Goa and freak out!	"Man, there is nothing in Goa . Let's go to Mysore .."	"The best place to booze on earth is our house itself. What say?"	"Drinking is injurious to health."

Heading	First Week	Second Week	Third Week	Fourth Week
a) Bank Balance	20000	20000	20000	20000
b) Conveyance	Auto ("after all my boy friend pays for it")	Auto ("after all my boy friend pays for it")	Auto ("after all my boy friend pays for it")	Auto ("after all my boy friend pays f or it")
c) Boy Friends	Supun, ruwan, kamal	sithum, randheer, vijaey	Rumesh, Umesh, Ramesh	Shehan , thilan, Rihan
d) Mobile Maintenance	Only Incoming calls (Its for ppl 2 call me)	Only Incoming calls (Its for ppl 2 call me)	Only Incoming calls (Its for ppl 2 call me)	Only Incoming calls (Its for ppl 2 call me)
e) Boozing	"Come, let's go to Blue Elephant	"Come, let's go to Taj	"Come, let's go to Mt lavinia	"Come, let's go to Grand

 

Some, rather most organizations reject his CV today because he has changed jobs frequently (10 in 14 years). My friend, the job hopper (referred here as Mr. SP), does not mind it. Having worked full-time with 10 employer companies in just 14 years gives Mr.. SP, the relaxing edge that most of the company loyal employees are struggling for today. Today, Mr. SP too is laid off like some other 14-15 year experienced guys, the difference being the latter have just worked in 2-3 organizations in the same number of years. Here are the excerpts of an interview with Mr. SP:

Q: Why have you changed 10 jobs in 14 years?
A: To get financially sound and stable before getting laid off the second time.

Q: So you knew you would be laid off in the year 2009?
A: Well I was laid off first in the year 2002 due to the first global economic slowdown. I had not got a full-time job before January 2003 when the economy started looking up; so I had struggled for almost a year without job and with compromises.

Q: That was your second job?
A: That was my third job.

Q: So from Jan 2003 to Jan 2009, in 6 years, you have changed 8 jobs to make the count as 10 jobs in 14 years?
A: I had no other option. In my first 8 years of professional life, I had worked only for 2 organizations thinking that jobs are deserved after lot of hard work and one should stay with an employer company to justify the saying employer loyalty. But I was an idiot.

Q: Why do you say so?
A: My boss didnt give me the promotion i deserved more than anyone . I could not save enough and also, I had thought that I had a permanent job, so I need not worry about what will I do if I lose my job. I could never imagine not getting a promotion because of lack of accountability on the power-center for its actions and and losing a job due to economic slowdown and not because of my performance. But you cant expect the world to be perfect. Unfortunately, you will face more injustices in future and you cannot be bogged down by them in life and need to think about your family and the people who care for you and move forward.That was January 2002.

Q: Can you brief on what happened between January 2003 and 2009.
A: Well, I had learnt my lessons for being company/boss loyal and not money earning/saving loyal. But then you can save enough only when you earn enough. So I shifted my loyalty towards money making and saving I changed 8 jobs in 6 years assuring all my interviewers about my stability.

Q: So you lied to your interviewers; you had already planned to change the job for which you were being interviewed on a particular day?
A: Yes, you can change jobs only when the market is up and companies are hiring. You tell me, can I get a job now because of the slowdown? No. So one should change jobs for higher salaries only when the market is up because that is the only time when companies hire and can afford the expected salaries.

Q: What have you gained by doing such things?
A: That's the question I was waiting for. In Jan 2003, I had a fixed salary (without variables) of say Rs. X p.a. In January 2009, my salary was 8X. So assuming my salary was Rs.3 lakh p.a. in Jan 2003, my last drawn salary in Jan 2009 was Rs.24 lakh p.a. (without variable). I never bothered about variable as I had no intention to stay for 1 year and go through the appraisal process and billability drama for the company to give me a promotion or a hike.

Q: So you decided on your own hike?
A: Yes, in 2003, I could see the slowdown coming again in future like it had happened in 2001-02. Though I was not sure by when the next slowdown would come, I was pretty sure I wanted a debt-free life before being laid off again. So I planned my hike targets on a yearly basis without waiting for the year to complete.

Q: So are you debt-free now?
A: Yes, I earned so much by virtue of job changes for money and spent so little that today I have a loan free 2 BR flat (1200 sq.. feet) plus a loan free big car without bothering about any EMIs. I am laid off too but I do not complain at all. If I have laid off companies for money, it is OK if a company lays me off because of lack of money.

Q: Who is complaining?
A: All those guys who are not getting a job to pay their EMIs off are complaining. They had made fun of me saying I am a job hopper and do not have any company loyalty. Now I ask them what they gained by their company loyalty; they too are laid off like me and pass comments to me why will you bother about us, you are already debt-free. They were still in the bracket of 12-14 lakh p.a. when they were laid off.

Q: What is your advice to professionals?
A: Like Narayan Murthy had said love your job and not your company/boss because you never know when your company/boss will stop loving you.That was the biggest mistake i did in my carreer. In the same lines, love yourself and your family needs more than the company's/boss's needs. Companies keep coming and going; family will always remain the same. Make money for yourself first and simultaneously make money for the company, not the other way around.

Q: What is your biggest pain point with companies?
A: When a company does well, its CEO will address the entire company saying, well done guys, it is YOUR company, keep up the hard work, I am with you. But when the slowdown happens and the company does not do so well, the same CEO will say, It is MY company and to save the company, I have to take tough decisions including asking people to go. So does your manager when you do all those night-outs for critical deliveries to save his/her face, they thank you saying u are flexible and it will be rewarded which might not happen due to incomprehensible reasons later. So think about your financial stability first; when you get laid off, your kids will complain to you and not your boss.

A little boy went into a store and reached for the public telephone.Standing on an empty carton--he was too short to reach the buttons-and proceeded to dial the numbers.
The store-owner got curious and listened to the conversation:
Boy: Good morning Ma'am! I'm a boy looking for a part time job... Can I cut your lawn?
Woman: (at the other end): No, I already have someone to cut my lawn.
Boy: O, is that? Lady, I can do the job for half the price you are paying now.
Woman: No, my boy. I'm very satisfied with the person who is presently doing it.
Boy: (with more perseverance) Ma'am, I'll even sweep your curb and your sidewalk, so on Sunday you will have the prettiest lawn in all of Palm Beach.
Woman: No, thank you.
With a smile on his face, the little boy replaced the receiver. The store-owner, who was listening to all this, walked over to the boy. Store Owner: Hmm... Too bad the lady  refused! But I like your positive
spirit! Good, I can offer you a job.
Boy: No Sir, thanks. I don't need a job. I'm already engaged.
Store Owner: But you were really pleading for one!
Boy: Sir, I was just checking my performance at the job I already have. I am the one who is working for that lady I was talking to!
 
Well, this is what you call Self Appraisal

A  Sindhi phones a dentist to enquire about the cost for a Tooth extraction.. .....

"Rs5000 for an extraction, Sir" the dentist replied.
"Rs5000!!!  Benha lakh lalat vijhe... Have you not got anything cheaper?"

"That's the normal charge," said the  dentist.
"Naarmal?!!! What about if you did not use any anesthetic?"

"That's unusual, sir, but I could do it and knock Rs 1500 off and it would be quite painful !!"
"Are beehna...Whaaat about if you used one of your dentist trainees and still without an anesthetic?"

"I can't  guarantee their professionalism and it may be extremely painful, but the  price could drop to Rs 2000".
"Suttho Suttho...How about if you make it a training session, and your Student do the extraction with the other students waatching and learning ?

"It'll be good for the students", mulled  the dentist. "but you must understand that it's going to be very  traumatic as well as really really painful, but I'll charge you Rs 500."
"Arre wah!!!, now you are taalking!!!!! !  Daadho suttho deal aahe !!! daadho suttho (It's a great deal)," said the Sindhi. "Can you immeejaietly confirm an appaintment for my wife next Tuesday then?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Aaamir